The Future of The GLOMM
/Five years ago I created The Global League of Magicians and Mentalists (scroll down this page to June 2016 for a few posts about the formation of The GLOMM). The GLOMM is the largest magic organization in the world because there are no membership dues and you don’t have to apply to be a part of it. If you’re interested in magic, then you’re in the GLOMM already.
Originally, the GLOMM was sort of a joke. You see, the GLOMM had two rules for membership:
1- Don’t be convicted of a sex crime.
2- And don’t be an asshole to me personally.
Anyone who does one or the other gets removed from the GLOMM. You can see them on this list where I didn’t differentiate between someone I think is an asshole and someone who was convicted of a sex crime. That was kind of the joke. (Although it was more of a threat than a joke, because I didn’t end up putting any assholes on there, even when I should have.)
Then in 2017 I made this post trying to find details about an Australian magician who was convicted of raping multiple underaged girls. (For whatever reason, Australia doesn’t (or didn’t at the time) give the names of convicted pedophiles.) Due to some detective work by a reader of the site, we found out his name was David Drowley aka Twister the Clown.
Then in 2018 I received an email from the father of one of the victims of this sack of shit. He wrote:
Thank fuck you banned that cunt from your organisation. Excuse my language. Actually, no, my language is too kind for that pedophile.
My daughter was one he brutally raped when she was a child, and she was too fucking scared to tell me for two fucking years. 18 kids have come forward with information about that fucking cunt. 18 to my knowledge, anyway.
Get the word out there to make sure David the fucking cunt Drowley never touches another child. The problem is he will get out of prison, and will return to birthday parties cos he doesn't know any other kind of work. I want to make sure what my daughter had to endure never happens to another child.
He would visit my house in the middle of the night, completely drunk on bourbon, and I let him sleep on the couch. I had no idea what he was doing. He threatened my daughter to scare her out of telling me or authorities what he had done, I only found out when, at age ten, she decided to run away incase he visited again. Thankfully she returned that night, and police investigated. My daughter told them what happened. We put him in prison.
It was then that I decided that whatever may happen with this site, The GLOMM will continue on indefinitely.
If he’s not already, Drowley will be getting out of prison soon. And when he does—if he’s hoping to continue on with his magic “career”— I’ll make sure his history always catches up with him. He’ll undoubtedly try using a different name, but I trust Jerx: Australia will keep an eye out for him. “But he paid his dues to society!” Well, tough shit. I don’t know what to tell you. He didn’t pay his dues to the GLOMM because, as I said, there are no dues. However there is a rule: keep your little dick to yourself.
Look, I don’t know if there are a greater percentage of perverts in magic than there are in any other field, but that’s certainly the impression that you get. At the very least there is a public perception that magicians/clowns—especially ones who perform for children—are more likely to be creeps. Who knows. But it doesn’t seem to be the sort of thing any “real” magic organization is going to keep on top of. If you expose the thumbtip to someone, you might get kicked out of the International Brotherhood of Magicians. But expose your penis tip to someone? Hey, no problemo. Don’t worry, you feckless dummies, the guy who writes the stupid magic blog will pick up the slack for you when it comes to policing this shit.
(Also, I would like to announce that going forward, profits from the sale of GLOMM Membership Kits will be going to a related charity or charities. (Not sure which yet. If you have a recommendation, send it my way.)
We’re currently restocking a couple different shirt sizes for the membership kit. But that usually doesn’t take more than a few weeks at most, and those orders will ship when the new stock is in. See the membership kit page for details.)