Gardyloo #51

I got pump-faked by my google alerts today.

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Uh-oh, who is it now? Whose GLOMMbership must I revoke?

And then I open the email...

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Ah, you got me, Association for Child Abuse Prevention, you tricky rascals!

[This will only make sense to those of you who have at a moderately extensive knowledge of magic. If you're one of the people that isn't that into magic, and you just come here for the outstanding humor and genius writing, this will be lost on you.]

I've been congested for the past day or two and last night I went to bed and I was just constantly blowing my nose. Blow, blow, blow... the airways feel clear... and then a moment later, more snot. I almost never get sick, so I'm a big baby when I do. And this was annoying the shit out of me. Where is this snot coming from that it can keep coming back after I blow my nose, time and time again?

It was with this thought running through my mind that I eventually fell asleep. When I awoke I found a note that I only half-remembered scribbling down in the middle of the night on a pad on my nightstand where I write down potential ideas (for this site or for other things).

I had written: Snota Bowl.

That's some pretty solid wordplay for 4am. Max Maven would be proud to have come up with it. I mean... he'd be ashamed too, but mostly ashamed of how proud he was.


Is there any literature on hypnotism that might be beneficial reading for someone who performs, primarily, one on one? That is to say, I'm not really interested in stage hypnotism stuff which seemingly amounts to "I'll pretend to hypnotize you and you pretend to be hypnotized and then we'll do some boring schtick for the audience."

But I'm wondering if there's a book any of you would recommend that might delve into inducing a relaxed or "open" state of mind, or something like that. Something that could then lead into a magic presentation. To that end, it doesn't really need to work. It would be an "Imp" leading to the effect.  I could just make something up, but I was wondering if there is something already established that I could build off of. Let me know.

Show Me Your Wonder Room

The Wonder Room is a broad presentational concept that can be summed up in the idea that you should have some effects on display, which can lead into performances in an organic, human way when you have people visiting.

Obviously not every effect is a candidate for being out in the open where people can look at and potentially handle it. But there are many effects that can withstand total or partial examination that could be used in this context. And as "someone with an interest in magic," it makes sense that you would have some of these curiosities you've come across in a place where people can see them and not just stuffed under your bed or in a closet. 

Reader Gary Einstein sent along these pictures of his Wonder Room (shelves). Presented below with his descriptions. 

He writes:

"I cycle items in and out but at the moment they hold an Astro Ball cabinet, a vintage Kreskin ESP game that I’ve tricked out, a Fogel Treasure Chest, Anverdi Mental Die, a glass tray with an Alice in Wonderland rabbit holding a six of spades, a CW Gift of Time clock, a slew of gaffed books and dictionaries, and a few other surprises."

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"The Premonition deck-switching box with the Aladdin cards, when closed and turned on its edge, is a bookend or is slid between books. Same with the Tommy Wonder card cubes game. 

The Anverdi Key Box I tend to cycle in and out for display with the Anverdi Mental Die box and with the non-electronic Key Box made by Bazar de Magia. Each of these boxes, as well as the Fogel Treasure Chest, house a number of smaller magic items, some of which relate to the box in which they are housed (as per the Kreskin Game). You might also recognize a couple of Richard Himber pieces and a set of Tommy Wonder Wandering Chimes."

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"Here’s a look inside the Kreskin game that I retrofitted with three Promystic MD cubes, a marked Royal ESP deck, and an old U.F. Grant Dial-X that is now a star sign guesser."

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If you have something similar to the Wonder Room concept, I'd be interested in seeing your pictures. To be clear, I have zero interest in seeing pictures of your magic collection. What I'm interested in are pictures of a display that is intended to lure in people and serve as a jumping off point for actually performing for people, as in the pics above and this post.

Magicians are Creeps: Part 755


... the fuck?

Look, I don't really have an issue with a squirting wand. Maybe there's some context where it could be funny. Really the question I have is... why did we have to bring "pee" into the equation? It couldn't have just been a squirting wand?

I'm guessing whoever put the ad together realized they'd sell more wands if they could get magicians to fantasize about giving the kids they perform for a golden shower. Sex sells, and these guys know their consumers. "A squirting wand? Hmm... no thanks. What's this? A pee wand? So it would be like I'm shooting my own salty lemonade all across those little kids' faces? Get out of my way, erection! I need to order this now!"

Andy, why must you always insist all magicians are perverted creeps?

I'm not saying that.

I'm saying all kid's magicians are.

What better gift for the kid's magician in your life than this? Not the gift of the wand itself, but the gift of plausible deniability. Now the next time they do that trick where you spoon a little kid so you can be their arms during the course of a magic trick...


...if the magician has an "accident" they can be like, "Gaahhhh!... oops... uhm... that was my squirting wand. I swear! Now go clean yourself up."

The ad says, "All the kids will want you to squirt them."

Suuuurrrrre... let me know how that victim blaming goes for you.

"But your honor, they were begging for it."

[Thanks to Ben Benjamins for sending the ad my way.]