Dustings of Woofle #4

Congrats to finalist #9, MT, who god (or fate in the form of the New York Lottery) chose as the winner of the Exaltation of Joshua Jay contest. He donned a red jacket, put together a globe puzzle and smashed his hair down on his forehead and now he has the prize package coming his way. Of course, he happens to be in Greece so it’s going to cost me $60 to ship him this stuff. Damn me and my incredible cross-cultural appeal!

Here’s Eva Anderson (Harry Anderson’s daughter) on the Doughboys podcast with a couple quick anecdotes about David Copperfield and Criss Angel. They’re amusing, but not particularly surprising. After each story I thought, “Yeah, that sounds about right.”

If you like dumb jokes in your patter, here’s a mildly funny one I heard on an old Cheers episode (there are no new Cheers episodes, in case you were waiting for them). It’s similar in structure to some other jokes I’ve heard magicians tell, but I think it’s a little funnier.

“Do you believe in intuition?” you ask. They respond with whatever.

“Interesting. I don’t believe in intuition. But I have this strange feeling that someday I will.”

Oh my god… this poor woman. Can you imagine being locked in prison 10 years for a murder you didn’t commit, only to finally be set free. And then, just when you think your nightmare is over, you have to sit through a Joshua Jay show?

Whose demented idea was this? After all she’s been through.

“Andy, you’re looking at it the wrong way. She lost 10 years of freedom, and this 90 minute show feels like it takes about a decade to finish. So perhaps seeing this show helped balance the scales in some way—gave her a greater sense of time on the outside.”

No, that’s not how it works. All they did was steal an hour and a half more of her precious freedom. Those monsters. My heart goes out to her.